Category: journal

Talk of Superpowers

Laura Highcove

Talk of Superpowers:
There was talk recently in the DIY MFA sphere, about superpowers, that aspect of every writer’s personality that helps them to write their story.

I waffled on this a little bit because I was thinking of it from a place of “What am I good at?”. Instead I realized that what Gabriela actually meant is closer to what my yoga instructor refers to as a dharma. Now if you google dharma, you won’t get this definition, but I use it to mean a person’s true self. If you set aside your family and friends, your job, your hobbies, your passions, and pursuits, then who are you?

I am authentic:
There was one call for DIY MFA where I remember Gabriela asking, “How did you tell the people in your life that you are a writer?”

And I remember thinking on that while other people gave their answers, and then she asked me that question and I said: “I never had to tell people I was a writer, I just always have written, and the people around me know that I write.”

I later realized that that sums up who I am. I am authentic. Everything that I am is open and out there and everything that I’m not doesn’t exist.

How this shows up in my writing:
My characters end up authentic, truthful, reasonable, and willing to see another person’s point of view. It makes it difficult for me to write truly evil villains and only recently have I been able to write characters having verbal arguments without one or both of them apologizing and coming to see the other person’s point of view by the end.

This means I don’t have conflict created by misunderstandings. When my characters fight or disagree, it’s because they have (at least mostly) reasonable views on life, that just happen to conflict.

I want my readers to be able to understand where a character is coming from, even if they don’t agree with where they’re going. (Oh, that sounds tweet-able, too bad I don’t twitter.)

Now for other things:
I wanted to write this post because I wanted to put up something about myself that wasn’t just a laundry list of the things I’ve been doing in my writing. I’m not sure if people are enjoying that or not, since I don’t really get feedback, but I feel like it might get old after a while.

For those of you who might like my laundry list: I’m still working on the Arthur tale. It is rough and I don’t feel like I have a focus right now. The story is just kind of happening, which means I just need to keep powering through until something comes out that feels right. One more week and then I start on fights.

Continuing the Smoothing

Laura Highcove

Nothing much of interest going on this week. I’m still working through the story in the same method as I mentioned last week, though I am a good deal further than I expected to be. Bluebeard was quick and easy, which was not a surprise, but the Headquarters section also went very smoothly except for the scene here that has always given me trouble. When I talk about the writing of this book after it comes out, I will certainly talk about how important this scene is, and how dang-blasted hard it was to write.

I started the King Arthur tale midday on Saturday and I’m already aware of how not smoothly this tale is going to go. But it is the newest part of this story (writing wise) and thus the most raw. Even the climactic final battle and denouement were written prior to this section. However, I can start to see the story behind me actually smoothing out, which is a great feeling. Still needs work, but it is better.

I’m hoping two weeks will give me enough time to smooth out this tale. I’m still hoping to get started on my fights starting in April, and that will be a whole new adventure.

The Need to Expand

Laura Highcove

So I spent most of this week on the Cinderella tale. I managed to rework some of the story and found I really needed to expand the whole ending. I always thought my writing style was pretty superfluous, because I’m so good at stretching things to get to word count when word count is my goal. But I seem to have more cases where I have clearly not written enough, or I have skipped over describing things that are rather necessary in my haste to get to …somewhere.

I’m not exactly sure what causes this phenomenon. I suppose they could be parts that I think are boring. Like when you have a scene in a TV show that you know only exists to create a baseline. The scene is not always entertaining on it’s own, but if you don’t have that baseline, then it’s not as impactful when things go sideways.

So to that end (the need to expand sections) I have been having a bit of stress. Writing new words means they’re rough and choppy and in general make me feel like I’ve taken a step backward instead of forward.

I also suck at scene changes. Getting into a scene and getting out of a scene, so I am planning on pulling out a lot of my collection of books and reading how people do scene changes so I can gain some skill in that.

I ended up not doing the shoehorning method with orange issues that I said I was going to do last week, mostly because the story ended up not needing showhorning, but reordering and smoothing. Of course that means it took far longer than I was expecting. The Cinderella tale took the entire week and it needed a medium amount of work. Now I’m on my way to Bluebeard, which I think is the most together of all the tale sections, so it might not take the whole week. Headquarters is probably similar to Cinderella, but Arthur …Arthur is going to take some serious work.

So new goal is to see if I can smooth Bluebeard in less than a week.

Colorizing Comments

Laura Highcove

So the plan I made last week ended up not working quite the way I thought it would. The idea of there being major, medium, and minor issues and such just did not work for me. I found it easier to compartmentalize the issues by making comments and coloring them (Yay Scrivener!) as follows:

Where I needed to go outside of the current tale in order to fix a plot hole or add some foreshadowing, I colored comments red.

Then plot holes and foreshadowing needed within a tale were colored orange.

Small issues like not liking a description or needing more detail I marked with yellow.

Once I had this list, I tackled the red issues first, as that required the most jumping around to different parts of the story, as well as, in a few instances, figuring out *where* I was going to put the foreshadowing. In all of these cases, I basically shoehorned in the necessary comment/description, which will need to be smoothed in on next revision.

As of now, I have all but two red issues resolved. It went a lot more quickly than I thought it would.

The plan for this week is to now go through the story and start working on the orange issues. I am going to follow the same shoehorning method as with the red issues. I am hoping it won’t take more than a week.

After the orange issues are done, I’m going to do a read through/smoothing pass and see if I come out the other side with fewer issues.

Alpha Read Complete on The Storyteller

Laura Highcove

My husband has finished alpha reading The Storyteller. From what he’s said to me (I haven’t read the comments yet) he thinks it’s a good story with all the bones and a lot of the organs it needs.

And I still find myself nervous to get it back and read it, not because I’m worried about anything he has to say about it, but because now I am about to plunge even deeper into unknown territory. I am actually going to take a story and make it readable by people who are not writers.

…

Sorry, I had to take a moment to refocus there. As a writer, of course the end goal is to have people read what I write. But it always felt like it was so …far off. And I suppose it is still far off, as I have revisions and beta reads and, you know, finding an agent, BUT I am closer than I’ve ever been before. And the next step will take me even closer than that.

And I’m scared. And I’m admitting I’m scared. I’m worried that the story isn’t as good as I remember it. I’m worried that there will be a huge plot hole I can’t fix. I’m worried that once I put all this effort into it, people won’t like it. And I’m worried that even if I manage this and it’s a success, that I’ll never be able to write anything as good again.

Oh the doubts of the writer. We’re such silly creatures. Nothing left but to soldier on in the face of all my doubts because the only other option is to give up writing, and I’m not going to do that.

Plan:
First off, I am going to read the alpha read comments from my husband. I will organize these things into three categories:

Major Issues: plot holes/foreshadowing, new scenes to write from scratch

Medium Issues: plot holes within a scene

Minor issues: Flow issues. Description.

Once I have the list of major issues, I will work on going back to fix them. I’m pretty sure most of them just have to do with foreshadowing. I’m hoping none of them are actual serious plot holes.

After that is done, I will do a read-through while smoothing out the plot, and making a new list. Hopefully it will be smaller.

Rinse and repeat until I’ve fixed all the major issues. (And the medium and minor issues should be fixed up along the way.)

I’m hoping by April I can start in on fight scenes, which I am basically leaving alone for now. I’m sure I’ll reevaluate beginning of April as well.

Remembering the Process

Laura Highcove

Now as you may or may not remember, The Storyteller is currently in my husband’s hands for alpha reading right now.

I made the decision to work on Jeremy Five-five, but I talked myself out of that after a bit, then I wandered through working on Blessings of the Nerial and to some background work on The Storyteller.

It took me until just recently to figure out why I was having such a hard time focusing on a project.

Firstly, I didn’t give myself a goal. I need to know, at least, what I am trying to accomplish in order to stay focused.

Secondly, I was attempting to work around my process. I know that my process is discovery writing, and that I have to discovery write multiple versions, and go back and tweak until I finally get an ending at which point I can actually start pulling the story together.

This is the step I am at with The Storyteller. It is not the point I am at with any of my other stories. However, I did attempt to start pulling Jeremy Five-five together and it was working out very poorly for me, then the same thing happened with Blessing of the Nerial.

This is just another of those reminders life likes to throw at me, that when things get super hard I need to take a step back and figure out why. I usually figure out that I am working against myself instead of with myself. I can’t pull a story together until I have discovery written to the end. Otherwise it’s like trying to finish a jigsaw puzzle without all the pieces, and some pieces from other puzzles.

So now I am back on Jeremy Five-five, with the plan to write toward the end. I am also giving myself a goal of 1000 words a day through the 29th. At that point my husband has to give me back The Storyteller and then we’ll see what wonderful mistakes I can make and learn from then!

Guest Posting!?

Laura Highcove

So this week I decided I would take the plunge and actually attempt to write a guest blog post for DIYMFA at the encouragement of my mentor. It is something that I haven’t thought about very seriously before this because I have very little skill writing blog articles. Despite the fact that I post something here every week, I have rarely made any attempts to make these posts follow a typical “blog format”. I found the best way to keep myself able to write one of these posts every week is to just allow myself to write what I want, how I want it. It helps to keep me accountable when I’m actively working toward a goal, and it helps me to evaluate and record my process. What is the point of spending hours struggling with a “real” blog post when I could be using that time to be doing literally anything else.

So it took me several days to come up with possible blog topics. Then a day to write the email pitching them to the web editor. I had to convince myself that my mentor would know if I didn’t send an email. I don’t know if she would or not, but I used it as a way to force myself to send the email.

Then I was nervous as I waited for a reply. Then when I got the reply it took me a day to work up the nerve to read it. Then when I read it and saw the topic the web editor had picked, I realized I was going to have to actually write the article. And I did, and it was horrible. So I let it sit and cleaned it up, and sent it to my hubby, and then edited it, and sent it to him again, and now I think I actually have something that will at least not embarrass me.

So what am I trying to say with this post? I am celebrating the fact that I was nervous and scared and outside my comfort zone and I did it anyway! Even if I send this post to the web editor and she says it needs to be rewritten. Even if it goes up and no one comments. I will still have done it, and that experience is very important. It has also taught me that when I am not writing fiction, I can’t keep a consistent tense to save my life. That is also important to know.

Picking Jeremy Five-five

Laura Highcove

So now that The Storyteller is out for it’s alpha read, I had to decide what I was going to do in the meantime. I actually spent a day making a chart for all the stories I have written. I recorded how far I am in them (most of them have far less word count than I thought) and what about each story makes me want to write it.

I decided on a story with the working title: Jeremy Five-Five. This story has a bit of an interesting backstory. I started it for NaNoWriMo one year. While I was writing it, I wasn’t really into it. My problem was that my main character (Jeremy) kept flipping back and forth between wanting to hide in the background and having nothing to do with the game being played by his classmates, and getting super pissed off when they were playing it poorly and I was having a hard time understanding where he was coming from. So I decided to stop working on it, and instead go back to working on Shifting Winds.

When I went back to read Jeremy Five-five later, I realized that what I had written was really good, and I was able to figure out what Jeremy’s motivation. The back and forth of the apathy and anger actually works for his character. I pushed forward on it a bit, created a new draft and then it had been sitting there when I got more serious about my writing and worked on Shifting Winds and then The Storyteller.

Now I’m back to it in the drafting phase. I’m just plowing forward on word count, and Jeremy continues to be a bugger and a half to write. I just can’t seem to pin him down, but at the same time I’m drawn to him like the other characters in the story seem to be. There’s something about him that is peaking out and I need to figure out what it is so he can really shine.

Super Sick

Laura Highcove

One of the joys of my life is that I tend to only get sick about once a year. Other times when sickness tries wiggle in, I can nap for a few hours and wake up and be fine, or sleep overnight and kick it.

When I do get sick, I take a light day from work, where I go home between chore times, take it easy, nap a bit, and then I’m okay in a day or two.

A week ago Thursday evening, I got a scratchy throat. I took a light day on Friday. The scratchy throat progressed to ouchie throat and lasted through the weekend.
On Monday I bundled up and went back to work and scheduled a doctor’s appointment for the afternoon. The Doctor said I looked fine, and gave me a prescription for Wednesday in case I wasn’t feeling better.

Tuesday my workmates tried to send me home but I didn’t want to sit at home and feel useless.

I woke up Wednesday morning with a fever. That’s when I began to realize that I was probably sicker than I thought and by going out in the (sudden) cold, I was just making myself worse.

Then I had my call with my mother and she smacked some sense into me, at which point I had to come to grips with the fact (I was now almost a week in) that I was, in fact, really sick and I needed to sit on my couch and do nothing.

So after discussions with my boss and workmates, I proceeded to send my husband out for battle supplies and I spent Thursday, all of it, on the couch watching movies and playing Zelda.

By Thursday afternoon I realized I wasn’t going to be better by tomorrow, so I called in for a second (!?) day off.

I didn’t sleep again Friday night, in fact I was brought into sharp awareness by the feeling of something draining out of my left ear. (Now, I have no hearing in my left ear, result of a surgery gone bad, so I am super sensitive about things going on in my ears.) I got an appointment with the doctor for 3:45 Friday sometime Friday morning, and then I slept until 2.

I actually felt much better on the sick front. Then I went to the doctor and was told my ears were red and horrible (infected) and I was given another antibiotic in addition to a steroid shot.

Friday night was the first time in a week I slept through the night. I took it easy Saturday as well, doing some laundry, playing some Zelda, doing some writing. Saturday I also slept through the night, so I think I’m on my way to recovery now.
It took me that long and that much hassle to admit to myself that I needed to take it easy. I am so human.

In light of my week, I am curious what things other people are stubborn about like this?

The Storyteller Revision is Done!

Laura Highcove

I officially reached my goal of finishing my revision pass of the Storyteller. This is Draft 6, and it has now been sent to the hubby for an alpha read, which means that is off my plate for at least two months.

Finishing up a draft and shifting to something else is always a weird time for me. I keep feeling like I should be doing something with the story and I have to remind myself that not only do I not have to, I’m not allowed to. It has to sit, after all, so I can go back to it with fresh eyes.

How am I feeling about the story thus far? Pretty darn good. Very good about the first half, and okay about the second half. It’s newer than the first half so it’s still rather rough.

And there’s one character that I haven’t decided what to do with at the end of the book. He might be there or he might just disappear until book two. I feel like I should keep him in, it just means the final fight has seven people in it, and that is a lot of bodies to keep track of. I’ll just wait for the alpha feedback.

For now, I’m working on cranking out words on a new story, though I’m not planning on working on it hard enough to have it done in the next two months. Part of the reason for that is I’m sick right now and being sick does not make me want to commit to 90k words in two months. (It is also why I didn’t get this post up yesterday.) We’ll see what happens when I get better.

But anyway, I’ll be off celebrating finishing my revision by replaying Twilight Princess.