Fear
Rage
Disbelief
Pain
Dizziness
Numbness
It was such a unfathomable outcome that I simply didn’t believe. I didn’t think people could be so hateful. So scared… I watched it happen in other countries, and I didn’t believe it could happen here. I’m going to watch my country crumble. The country that has surrounded and supported me, even though it wasn’t always the best. Even though it held back much of it’s love because I was born with a vagina. Even though. And it will go kicking and screaming as it’s raped by misogyny and racism and religious intolerance, but it will go. I will watch its gasping cries knowing that what I did wasn’t enough, and that all I can do now is sit in what privilege is afforded me, shielded while I whisper ‘I’m sorry I didn’t do more. I’m sorry I couldn’t save you.’ And wait to see if it swallows me too.
